Today was one of THOSE days! I had to go to Boston for my preop work. I also had the last PET scan for the trial I enrolled in. I worked very hard to make sure that everything would be scheduled for today in a timely manner (my neighbor was driving me in so Steve could work) so I would not have to inconvenience anyone. Anyway, we got to Boston in a very timely manner (45 minutes before my appointment) and for the first time the visit turned into a nightmare! We checked in for the PET scan and had a seat in the waiting room, where we sat until about 5 minutes before my appointment. At this time the receptionist informed me that they were looking for me in the radiology lab so I could have my IV placed. I had been told it would be done in the PET scan area. Anyway, I went to the lab. The technician had no problem drawing the blood (she actually got a great vein) but there was paper work for a new study I have been enrolled in (to create a vaccine from my cancer cells -- very interesting concept) and she had no idea how to handle it. She spent the better part of a half hour on the phone with this person and that person trying to get protocol hammered out. In the meantime, I am sitting in the chair with a tourniquet tightned on my arm. She must have tied and released it six times before placing the IV and getting the blood (7 tubes, I might add) so I could go back to get my scan, an hour late. The scan was a sinch though.
I was now an hour late for the remainder of my appointments for preop. My next trauma came in finding the offices I was supposed to be. I am not used to getting around Brigham & Women's Hospital. Luckily we shared an elevator ride with one of the guides who helped us find where we had to go. We were swept in and out of preoperative counseling and then went for the history and PE and preoperative directions. Here we waited for 2 hours before we were approached and told we would be called soon but that I needed to go for a chest xray "downstairs" and that if I went right away they would get me right in since there was "no one" down there. I scooted off to radiology to find a waiting room of people in need of xray services. :) I was happy. Luckily it only took about 15 minutes to get the films done and we were back upstairs. After about another 15 minute wait we were escorted to a room for H&PE. It was here that I got the BEST news of all. I needed blood work too. I explained I had given 7 tubes of blood at Dana Farber that morning and that it was my understanding that that draw was for my surgical needs. Oh no...they do not require the same tests and I needed to have another draw, which should only be a couple of tubes. Yeah, right! They took another 4 tubes of blood. I am lucky to be standing at this point. Anyway, that is finished and everything looks good to go. Short of being a bit anemic, I survived my Boston ordeal.
Next week is surgery. I will arrive at 8:00 and hopefully things will go much more smoothly. Hubby will be with me. I am not sure whether that will help or not, but I think it will.
Keeping the faith! :~)
Kim
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Saturday, August 20, 2011
My little girl is moving out
I know there comes a point in each mom's life where they watch their little birdies fly solo and my turn has come for the first time. The lease has been signed. The boxes are being packed and plans are being made. Way to go Lauren!! This is what every mom waits for. We work so hard to get them going in the right direction. We nag, we yell, we encourage, we support and then finally we watch them fly. I could not be any prouder than I am. The best news is that she will continue to go to school and hopefully will finish her degree as planned. I would hate to see her give up on this plan simply because new challenges are going to present themselves. When things seem hardest it is most important to hang onto your dreams (are you listening Lauren?)! You can't forget how important those dreams are to you.
Emily is starting school on the 29th. She is a junior this year. She will have the new experience of attending a technical school rather than the normal high school. I think this will be very exciting for her, although a little anxiety producing since it is a new adventure. Hopefully she will get her license next week and will be able to drive herself to school, enjoying some of the independence she has been looking forward to. I hope she too has been listening and that she realizes independence comes with lots of responsibility. My fingers are crossed!
As for the parents in this situation, we are hanging in. Things are changing rapidly, and daily. We look forward to having time to ourselves again and getting to know each other all over again. I have to give us credit in that department, though. We have never really completely stopped dating so we have a pretty good idea that we still like each other, at least a little bit. I can't imagine life without him -- even on those days when he comes home after a two hour commute and is an absolute bear to deal with. We all get tired and frustrated and it's good we can recognize it.
Keeping the faith!
Kim :~)
Emily is starting school on the 29th. She is a junior this year. She will have the new experience of attending a technical school rather than the normal high school. I think this will be very exciting for her, although a little anxiety producing since it is a new adventure. Hopefully she will get her license next week and will be able to drive herself to school, enjoying some of the independence she has been looking forward to. I hope she too has been listening and that she realizes independence comes with lots of responsibility. My fingers are crossed!
As for the parents in this situation, we are hanging in. Things are changing rapidly, and daily. We look forward to having time to ourselves again and getting to know each other all over again. I have to give us credit in that department, though. We have never really completely stopped dating so we have a pretty good idea that we still like each other, at least a little bit. I can't imagine life without him -- even on those days when he comes home after a two hour commute and is an absolute bear to deal with. We all get tired and frustrated and it's good we can recognize it.
Keeping the faith!
Kim :~)
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Mosquito bites
I am going to complain about my mosquito bites! I don't know why I can go through chemo and only complain a little bit but then I spend a night by the firepit and get my ankles bit by mosquitoes and I feel like I am losing my mind! Why do they like my ankles so much anyway. The damned things (the bites) keep me up at night scratching, even with hydrocortisone cream applied. Actually it's nice to have something besides treatment to complain about. :)
I even got to weed my gardens the other day. THEY WERE A MESS! I have not been able to get out there all summer so everything was overgrown and ugly. I still have the beds out front to do but since I feel a little better every day I think that should be possible soon. Of course right now we have been dealing with nonstop rain for the past few days. That kind of makes it hard to work in the garden. We have reached the sad part of the summer too. I have no flowers blooming in most of my gardens at the moment. Well, really that is not true either. My back gardens have the hydrangeas blooming and out front the black-eyed susans are blooming. In the big garden out front, though, there is nothing. Soon, however, the mums will start and color will return. In the meantime there is plenty of green and, after all, green is a color. With all this rain the lawn is starting to look green again too.
Tomorrow is an Aunty day. My aunt is having cataract surgery and I will be taking her. It is nice to be on the driving end of a hospital visit again. The visit is supposed to be a 3-4 hour visit so I think I will probably come home and Emily wants to go shopping at the consignment stores so that is the plan, before we have to pick Aunty up again. The day after she has a doctor's appointment, to which I will also bring her. Yes, it is nice to be on the transportation end again rather than the patient end!
Keeping the faith! :~)
Kim
I even got to weed my gardens the other day. THEY WERE A MESS! I have not been able to get out there all summer so everything was overgrown and ugly. I still have the beds out front to do but since I feel a little better every day I think that should be possible soon. Of course right now we have been dealing with nonstop rain for the past few days. That kind of makes it hard to work in the garden. We have reached the sad part of the summer too. I have no flowers blooming in most of my gardens at the moment. Well, really that is not true either. My back gardens have the hydrangeas blooming and out front the black-eyed susans are blooming. In the big garden out front, though, there is nothing. Soon, however, the mums will start and color will return. In the meantime there is plenty of green and, after all, green is a color. With all this rain the lawn is starting to look green again too.
Tomorrow is an Aunty day. My aunt is having cataract surgery and I will be taking her. It is nice to be on the driving end of a hospital visit again. The visit is supposed to be a 3-4 hour visit so I think I will probably come home and Emily wants to go shopping at the consignment stores so that is the plan, before we have to pick Aunty up again. The day after she has a doctor's appointment, to which I will also bring her. Yes, it is nice to be on the transportation end again rather than the patient end!
Keeping the faith! :~)
Kim
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Another humid day here in NH
I think someone forgot and left the humidifier going. They say it is going to break tomorrow but geez. Hot and humid...in August?!
Not much happening today. Spent a lot of time doing homework and getting my assignments finished up. These two classes are just about finished and I have seven left before I do my SpEd internship. I have to start thinking about applying for certification and getting the internship set up. It seems like just yesterday I was starting. I am so grateful to my professors that I have been able to continue full steam while undergoing treatment. To boot, I have maintained a 4.0 average so far. (Keeping my fingers crossed for continued good luck and success!) I miss being in school (as a teacher) and very much look forward to getting back into it once school and treatment is over. In the meantime I am going to try to find something part time that will get me back into a school.
Anyway...I realized last night I have no bottom eyelashes. It is kind of freaky but I know that they will be growing back soon. My head is stubbly. I like to say I have a light five o'clock shadow. I even have a couple of hairs that are actually measurable -- about an inch long. You can still see the shine though. My eyebrows are another laughing matter. I have one that has turned almost completely blond and the other is only half there. I was thinking about checking out the Friends Place at DF this week and seeing how much the fake eyebrows are. I can't do much about the eyelashes (I don't think they make falsies for the bottom) but I know I could get eyebrows again. Maybe I should just bide my time and wait for my own hair to come back in. Decisions, decisions!
Keeping the faith! :~)
Kim
Not much happening today. Spent a lot of time doing homework and getting my assignments finished up. These two classes are just about finished and I have seven left before I do my SpEd internship. I have to start thinking about applying for certification and getting the internship set up. It seems like just yesterday I was starting. I am so grateful to my professors that I have been able to continue full steam while undergoing treatment. To boot, I have maintained a 4.0 average so far. (Keeping my fingers crossed for continued good luck and success!) I miss being in school (as a teacher) and very much look forward to getting back into it once school and treatment is over. In the meantime I am going to try to find something part time that will get me back into a school.
Anyway...I realized last night I have no bottom eyelashes. It is kind of freaky but I know that they will be growing back soon. My head is stubbly. I like to say I have a light five o'clock shadow. I even have a couple of hairs that are actually measurable -- about an inch long. You can still see the shine though. My eyebrows are another laughing matter. I have one that has turned almost completely blond and the other is only half there. I was thinking about checking out the Friends Place at DF this week and seeing how much the fake eyebrows are. I can't do much about the eyelashes (I don't think they make falsies for the bottom) but I know I could get eyebrows again. Maybe I should just bide my time and wait for my own hair to come back in. Decisions, decisions!
Keeping the faith! :~)
Kim
Saturday, August 6, 2011
August already, and almost half over at that!
Last night I spent my first night in a tent in almost forever. We used to tent camp when we were in our early 20s. Once the kids came along we moved to a camper and then, because my older child was such a pill about camping, we stopped entirely. We recently decided we wanted to start going again so I bought a tent -- a big tent! It sleeps 10 people (although we never plan to have that many people in it). It is a 3-room "vacation lodge." So anyway, we have had it set up in the yard to season and Steve mentioned he wanted to take it down to mow the lawn. I figured, why not?! So, last night Steve and I blew up the air mattress and took our bedclothes to the tent. No I did not draw out the sleeping bags because it would have been too hot. I took our 1500 count sheets and put them on the air mattress and we slept outside. I have to say I got the best night sleep I have gotten in forever. The only wrinkle was when I heard "something" walking through the gravel in the firepit. We live in NH after all so I know we have animals that roam the woods at night but I did not get to see what it was. It sounded kind of big, but not bear big. I think it could have been a fox or maybe a fisher cat. Either way, it walked through the firepit, by the tent, and then off into the woods. After that it was back to sleep. Today the tent came down. It got dried out and then rolled out and now will be put away until we decide to take it out into the world. I have to say, I loved the whole experience. The air mattress was comfortable (queen size). The tent was big so we had the air mattress at one end, room in the middle to set up a table and could have used the other end for camping chairs. It would be extremely comfortable for two people. I am sure it will work well with four of us too.
Anyway, back to reality. I am not very happy with my children right now. My older child has forgotten that respect is still expected even when you are an adult child. In my eyes when I ask a question if you have the information I am looking for then you answer the question -- not evade it by saying "It's none of my business." I understand the reticence to not get involved in the situation but it is not acceptable to not answer a direct question. We will talk about it later! And the other one... well, I am just tired of her half-ass doing everything. She is responsible for her own situation and refuses to accept that responsibility. I am so tired of hearing that it is someone else's fault for her shortcomings. Time to grow up and face reality -- and unfortunately I am sure that she will very soon, as far as her job is concerned.
As for me, I am okay. The effects of the last chemo treatment have pretty much worn off. I had my last MRI and echo yesterday and I will get those results next week. School is going okay and this semester will end very soon. I am registered for two classes next semester, both on campus, so it might be a little more challenging. I am going to try very hard to keep on track, or even a little ahead. I now have two weeks before I have to return for any more poking and prodding (preop testing is on 8/23). Surgery is on 8/30. It is going to be day surgery and I am sure I will be sore and tired for a week or so afterwards. I will try not to whine. One foot in front of the other and one day at a time.
Keeping the faith! :~)
Kim
Anyway, back to reality. I am not very happy with my children right now. My older child has forgotten that respect is still expected even when you are an adult child. In my eyes when I ask a question if you have the information I am looking for then you answer the question -- not evade it by saying "It's none of my business." I understand the reticence to not get involved in the situation but it is not acceptable to not answer a direct question. We will talk about it later! And the other one... well, I am just tired of her half-ass doing everything. She is responsible for her own situation and refuses to accept that responsibility. I am so tired of hearing that it is someone else's fault for her shortcomings. Time to grow up and face reality -- and unfortunately I am sure that she will very soon, as far as her job is concerned.
As for me, I am okay. The effects of the last chemo treatment have pretty much worn off. I had my last MRI and echo yesterday and I will get those results next week. School is going okay and this semester will end very soon. I am registered for two classes next semester, both on campus, so it might be a little more challenging. I am going to try very hard to keep on track, or even a little ahead. I now have two weeks before I have to return for any more poking and prodding (preop testing is on 8/23). Surgery is on 8/30. It is going to be day surgery and I am sure I will be sore and tired for a week or so afterwards. I will try not to whine. One foot in front of the other and one day at a time.
Keeping the faith! :~)
Kim
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
It's been a while since I posted
Chemo is over. Our last infusion was Thursday, 7/28. Since then things have been a little tough. I have felt weak and not very motivated to do anything. I have been nauseous a lot. I am making it through each day but only by dragging my butt around. Today is Wednesday and it has been a little better. I am still nauseous, a little, but surviving. Nothing tastes good anyway so I should just settle on not eating, but then I get even weaker. I know this will pass. It always does. Every day is better than the one before. I still have headaches occasionally, the nausea, and hemorrhoids but at least the heartburn has been better. I feel thirsty a lot too so I make sure to drink plenty. They tell me this is because of the medications. Whatever!
My hair is starting to grow back. I have tiny little stubs on my head. I still need to cover my head when I go out, though. The Barbie wigs is being worn more often than not. I still love my hats and always will. Luckily you don't have to be bald to wear a hat. I have tiny little eyebrows and my eyelashes are few and far between, but they'll come back.
My nails are a mess! I consider myself lucky to still have them on my hands. It sometimes hurts to hit the keyboard. I wouldn't be surprised to see one of them fly off while I am typing. In the meantime I will keep them short and hope for the best.
What do I really have to complain about, honestly?! I am surviving. I will have surgery at the end of August and they have told me they expect the prognosis to be better than excellent. Surgery is likely to be minimal and is only day surgery. Radition, on the other hand, has to be for 30 treatments (standard of practice, they say) so I am really not looking forward to that. I must say though that by Thanksgiving I will really have something to be thankful for. I am looking forward to the holidays this year. I might choose to keep things simple but they will certainly be special.
Keeping the faith! :~)
Kim
My hair is starting to grow back. I have tiny little stubs on my head. I still need to cover my head when I go out, though. The Barbie wigs is being worn more often than not. I still love my hats and always will. Luckily you don't have to be bald to wear a hat. I have tiny little eyebrows and my eyelashes are few and far between, but they'll come back.
My nails are a mess! I consider myself lucky to still have them on my hands. It sometimes hurts to hit the keyboard. I wouldn't be surprised to see one of them fly off while I am typing. In the meantime I will keep them short and hope for the best.
What do I really have to complain about, honestly?! I am surviving. I will have surgery at the end of August and they have told me they expect the prognosis to be better than excellent. Surgery is likely to be minimal and is only day surgery. Radition, on the other hand, has to be for 30 treatments (standard of practice, they say) so I am really not looking forward to that. I must say though that by Thanksgiving I will really have something to be thankful for. I am looking forward to the holidays this year. I might choose to keep things simple but they will certainly be special.
Keeping the faith! :~)
Kim
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